Happy St. Patrick's Day!  / Lynda (Brian Colletti's mom )

I will always love you and keep you in my heart!  I will always see you "Irish Eyes a' Smiling!"  You played up your italian heritage and wore it like a badge but you always knew your heart was Irish!  Your italian looks attracted the women but your irish charm and warmth is what endeared you to them!  It endeared you to us all!  I love you my sweet Irish/Italian beautiful baby boy!  

You know this was a our 'holiday' where I reminded you I was your mostly Irish mother!  I will always be that, always and forever!  I pray your heaven is as beautiful as the green hills in this picture and that the rainbows are always plentiful and even more beautiful than what we can see here!  You are so missed!  I love you so much!  

Like the Celtic saying says~ Heaven and earth are only 3 feet apart, but in the thin places that distance is even smaller!

Until I am called home and can embrace you again, I will see you in the thin places!  

Peace & Love always~Mom

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The Prayer of St. Patrick


I arise today
Through the strength of heaven;
Light of the sun,
Splendor of fire,
Speed of lightning,
Swiftness of the wind,
Depth of the sea,
Stability of the earth,
Firmness of the rock.

I arise today
Through God's strength to pilot me;
God's might to uphold me,
God's wisdom to guide me,
God's eye to look before me,
God's ear to hear me,
God's word to speak for me,
God's hand to guard me,
God's way to lie before me,
God's shield to protect me,
God's hosts to save me
Afar and anear,
Alone or in a mulitude.

Christ shield me today
Against wounding
Christ with me, Christ before me, Christ behind me,
Christ in me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ on my right, Christ on my left,
Christ when I lie down, Christ when I sit down,
Christ in the heart of everyone who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks of me,
Christ in the eye that sees me,
Christ in the ear that hears me.

I arise today
Through the mighty strength
Of the Lord of creation.



Christian
source: Traditional

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Prayer for forgiveness  / Lynda (Brian Colletti's mom )
Prayer for Forgiveness

Forgive me my sins, O Lord; forgive me the sins of my youth and the sins of mine age, the sins of my soul and the sins of my body, my secret and my whispering sins, the sins I have done to please myself and the sins I have done to please others. Forgive those sins which I know, and the sins which I know not; forgive them, O Lord, forgive them all of Thy great goodness. Amen

Christian 

---

I believe that forgiveness is synonymous with love.  You cannot proclaim to love the way Jesus asks us to love and be unforgiving at the same time.  Forgiveness is a by-product of a loving spirit and just like love, if we want forgiveness for ourselves than we need to also be forgiving of others.  

Having said that, forgiveness is also something that seems to be misunderstood.  Forgiveness is separate from justice.  It does not mean that you condone unacceptable behavior or that you are willing to be a doormat.  

Forgiveness also doesn't necessarily happen instantaneously!  Many times it is a process, a spiritual process that we go through which strengthens us and draws us nearer to God.  Sometimes when we think we have forgiven someone, we find that there is still some residue left over somewhere that interferes with our inner peace.  This requires a deeper look within ourselves to see what it is that we are holding onto and ask God to help us to let it go.  I know from experience, if I allow my spirit to entertain unforgiveness, to let anger simmer inside of me, it will be like an infection of a cut, left unattended it will get worse, hurt more, and can have the power to cripple or even kill me, that is a dis-ease called resentment.  It will infect every area of my life and it will put out any light that shines within and will push out all goodwill that lives within me.  

Forgiveness is a lifestyle, it has to resonate deep in your soul and it teaches me to truly rely on God and to trust him not only with my life, but with all other lives...for we all belong to Him and He loves us all. 

1 John 2:9 ~ Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates his brother (fellow man or woman) is still in the darkness. 

I want to live in the light!  We think that being a forgiving person is a truly selfless person...I'm not so sure.  My greatest motive for forgiveness is to please God, to do my best to follow His way and to claim His blessings that He promises for believing in Him and doing His will.  Yes, it matters to me to be kind to people, my heart is very sensitive to the human spirit.  We are all the same, yet different.  I wish for a world with peace, love and joy.  I have found a way to have that right here on earth even in the midst of many trials and tribulations.  It's through believing & loving and being mindful to forgive, for we all fall short and as the saying goes, "People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones..."  I don't know about you, but I live in a glass house...

God please forgive me for my own shortcomings and forgive those who sin against me as well.

Peace & Love,
Lynda
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Sometimes I feel so angry...  / Mom
Dear Brian,
Sometimes I am so angry I don't know what to do with it!  I miss you and wish I could talk to you so bad!  You had a way of making me feel better without even knowing it.  That was one of your beautiful gifts!  I always knew you loved me, valued me for who I was, trusted me and you always treated me with respect and love.  Thank you for that!  

I've never been very good at reaching out when I felt bad or hurt.  I'm pretty good at reaching out to others to help them feel better and I that is really important to me!  I think you were a lot like me in that way.  You always put others in front of yourself, you rarely shared when someone had hurt you in some way.  You shared your hurts with me more times than I can count and what I remember the most is that you didn't want to be angry at someone, you didn't want to harbor any bad feelings, you always tried to see where they were coming from, looked for the good in them and you always wished them well, even as your own heart was breaking.  You could never understand the meaness in people and when your felt someone had betrayed you, God how that shook you at your very core...  (sometimes I feel like I failed you...but you were far from a failure!)

You had a resiliency that was truly divine.  You had a strong sense of right and wrong, you didn't always do the right thing, who does?  Jesus, that's it.  None of us always do the right thing, it just matters that we try the best we can.  Some don't care about doing what's right, some ignore their conscience and do what feels good to them, live so self-centered...  That was never you!  I think the wrongs that bothered you the most, the ones that truly rocked your soul were the wrongs against humanity.  The things that really hurt a person's being, things that left those permanent scars and made someone feel like they didn't matter.  You couldn't stand that.  Everyone mattered to you!  Even when others may have acted in unkind ways to you, you still would not hesitate to do anything for them if they needed somehting.  You loved humanity, you valued life and I so miss that.

I sometimes get to a place where I feel like I have nothing left.  Life overwhelms me, people and interaction with people overwhelms me.  Life hurts and there are times since you have been gone that the pain swallows me whole before I even know what hit me!!!  Damn, it hurts and I don't know how to say sometimes that I feel like I can't stand it anymore!  Does that make me a weak person, does it mean I'm not strong?  I don't know.  That's when I get really angry, when I think about that and I think, No!  Hurting and being overwhelmed by my grief from losing you is just a fact of my life now!  You were my son, my baby and you were taken from me in such a cruel way!!!  Everything has changed so much since that day.  My relationships are altered forever.  Some for the better and many have suffered.  I am so aware of the pain that others feel from your death, and many share that with me and they are sensitive to my pain, but that's not the case with everyone...  

I am not the same person I was before you died.  That woman died with you.  Very few people know me anymore, they don't know who I am or what's important to me.  Including some who are the closest to me.  I'm tired of worrying about what someone else thinks about me or thinks they know about me.  We all have to find our way the best that we can and that's all I want to do until the day comes that I get to see you again!  

The only relationship that truly matters is my relationship with God.  He gives me hope, strength and courage to press on.  He made a promise that I will see you again, that you are with him now and I will hold fast to that until the day I die!  

I need to let go of those who don't understand me and don't try to.  I don't need anyone critiquing my life at this point, that is only God's right and I will seek His love and guidance.  I have good instincts, a good mind and a strong will, a will that I am trusting to God and with that I can't fail!

I think about the stuff I have been through in my life, the things I have overcome and survived, and I question then how is it that I feel so inadequate at times?  Because I let the opinion of 1 or 2 resonate inside of me and shake me from the foundation of my soul that I know is solid...I'm done doing that!  I'm on solid ground and that is where I want to stay!!! 

Yes, I am hurting right now, I'm angry as hell and what I fear is feeling this stuff.  It still scares me, the intensity of those feelings deep inside.  I know I can't avoid it and I can't act like it isn't there.  It's there and it's loud and I'm nearly deaf from listening to it!!!  What I know for sure is that I do not HATE people, no one...but I do HATE some of the behavior and actions of people!  I HATE what James Moore and the rest of the Moore group did that night!  I HATE when someone treats me poorly, with little regard for anything that I might be feeling or caring about what my needs might be!  I don't expect anyone to cater to me, to meet my needs or to carry me emotionally...I am capable of taking care of myself as long as I have Jesus in my corner but I do have boundaries and I need to learn how to enforce them for my own sanity and well-being.

I love you Brian, so much it hurts...but that's a pain I am willing to bear for the rest of my living days!  I miss you sweet boy...
Loving you all the way to heaven~Mom

                  

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Update on the Brian Eddie Foundation, Inc.  / Lynda (Brian Colletti's mom )

Here is the mission statement, the Goal statement and the Vision statement for the Brian Eddie Foundation, Inc.  The incorporation is in, we are waiting for the papers to be sent back from the Secretary of State, then we will take care of the by-laws, put our Board members in place and secure our non-profit status.
Although it seems like it has taken a long time to get this far, I know that it is all working according to God's timetable.  I get impatient sometimes, but I have learned the value in not rushing and trusting the Lord to work things out as they are meant to.
I hope to have everything up and ready to operate by the summer.  I would like to do a kick-off event for the foundation.  I am playing around with some ideas, I'm thinking some kind of music concert or something.   I'll keep you posted.
I want everyone to understand that this is separate from the scholarship tournament that we have done for the past 2 years.  However, the DunkFan entity will belong to the foundation and will be one part of the foundation, a primary resource for raising funds and eventually growning into something more down the road.  This means that DunkFan will be able to host more torunaments in other areas, and hopefully we can have multiple tournaments in a years time!  We'll just have to see how it goes.
The important thing is that the foundation is a reality, it is an honor and a tribute to Brian's life and it will serve to reach out to those who need help and it will be a means of bringing people together and promoting unity and peace.  
This is just the beginning.....

God Bless you.  Thank you to all of your for your support, encouragement and prayers!  
Peace & Love always~ Lynda

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Brian Eddie Foundation, Inc. Mission Statement 

The Mission of the Brian Eddie Foundation, Inc. is to offer programs, services and activities based on Restorative Justice principles to address the needs of young people at risk, to foster and promote a culture of peace within the community and to encourage healing in those victimized by crime. To educate people on crime prevention and provide opportunities to awaken a spirit of caring and involvement in the general public, building a more tolerant and safer community. 

Brian Eddie Foundation, Inc. Goal Statement 

Our Goal is to improve attitudes and capabilities of our at risk youth and young adults, providing support and education that emphasizes the importance of taking responsibility for their lives, resolve problems non-violently and treat others with dignity and respect. We also strive to improve the attitudes of the public in general and recruit the support of community members helping at risk youth and young adults to become a contributing member of that community. 

The Brian Eddie Foundation, Inc. promotes Restorative Justice by encouraging community ownership through local involvement, the development and implementation of programs that reflect community values and seek to transform community perception, relationships and prejudices. Community and personal safety as well as peace are at the core of the Restorative Justice philosophy. We believe that we all have a responsibility to make our world and community less violent and a better place to live. 

Brian Eddie Foundation, Inc. Vision Statement 

We envision a community taking a proactive stand on crime, advocating prevention measures and seeking to achieve the ultimate goal of reducing crime and building a better, safer place to live.
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Link for a Special remembrance for Brian...  / Mom
Below is a link to a special balloon release.  It is very sweet.  I sent it from everyone who loved him, family & friends...
Enjoy~
*just copy the link if it will not work from here and paste it in your browser and it will work.


http://www.griefsupportservices.org/newgrief/remembrance/ceremonies/bl/24-02-2007-139/index.htm Close

Prayer for the Day  / Lynda (Brian Colletti's mom )
In the Way of the Cross

Almighty God, whose most dear Son went not up to joy but first he suffered pain, and entered not into glory before he was crucified: Mercifully grant that we, walking in the way of the cross, may find it none other than the way of life and peace; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord. Amen.

Christian
source: The Book of Common Prayer 1979 Close

Prayer for a Better World  / Lynda (Brian Colletti's mom )
Prayer for a Better World

O God, the source of creation, ever-present in the changes of this world, be present with your people who cry to you for help. Empower us with vision and strength to enable the peoples of this earth to acquire the skills and resources necessary to a growing world. Enable those from countries with plenty to share their lives, funds, and resources with those in need. Embolden those with vision to proclaim new ways of creating communities of responsibility. Engage us in learning from one another and in valuing the unique gifts that you have given to the people of every land. Bless your people, O God, who cry to you. Amen.

- Vienna Cobb Anderson 

---

The power of one with the strength of God can be pretty awesome, but when we combine our gifts, passion & desire to make this world a better place to live...I can only imagine!  

I am just one candle, one flame but I have a light in me to share with others...when you light several candles the light reaches so much further and can illuminate the corners that would otherwise remain in the dark.  

I am responsible to use my light and let God keep the flame burning like an eternal flame.  I pray others will do the same and fight the darkness that lurks in this world!

Peace & Love,
Lynda
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PRECIOUS BRIAN  / ROSE GRMA TO ANGEL BRITTANY SYFERT (ANGEL FRIEND )

As you hold me close in memory,
although we are apart,
my spirit will live on,
there within your heart...
I AM WITH YOU ALWAYS.

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Guidance... / Kerry (Friend of Brian's mom )

Dancing With God 

When I meditated on the word Guidance,
I kept seeing "dance" at the end of the word.
I remember reading that doing God's will is a lot like dancing.
When two people try to lead, nothing feels right.
The movement doesn't flow with the music,
and everything is quite uncomfortable and jerky.
When one person realizes that, and lets the other lead,
both bodies begin to flow with the music.
One gives gentle cues, perhaps with a nudge to the back
or by pressing Lightly in one direction or another.
It's as if two become one body, moving beautifully.
The dance takes surrender, willingness,
and attentiveness from one person
and gentle guidance and skill from the other.
My eyes drew back to the word Guidance.
When I saw "G: I thought of God, followed by "u" and "i".
"God, "u" and "i" dance."
God, you, and I dance.
As I lowered my head, I became willing to trust
that I would get guidance about my life.
Once again, I became willing to let God lead.
My prayer for you today is that God's blessings
and mercies be upon you on this day and everyday.
May you abide in God as God
abides in you.
Dance together with God, trusting God to lead
and to guide you through each season of your life.
This prayer is powerful and there is nothing attached.
If God has done anything for
you in your life,
please share this message with someone else,
for prayer is one of the best gifts we can receive.
There is no cost but a lot of rewards;
so let's continue to pray for one another.
And I Hope You Dance 

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Missing you.....  / Mom


My sweet Brian,
I miss you so much, especially today!  Any 'special' day is difficult without you here.  It is so hard to feel happy even though I know you want me to be happy.  I find it easier to experience happiness or have fun on just the so called ordinary days!  That may not make much sense to some, but I sure understand it.

Those days that have always been our special days in our family are hard to celebrate without you here.  I know I have others who love me.  And they have all let me know today and wished me a happy birthday!  But there will always be something missing...you.  I closed my eyes several times today and I could see myself answering the phone and hear your voice on the other end telling me Happy Birthday with  so much enthusiasm, you would have thought it was your birthday!!!  

I used to tell you & Chris when you guys were little that if you cried on your birthday, you'll cry all year long!  Well I'm afraid I may be crying all year long!  But my memories of you will always bring a smile through my tears and encourage me to keep on going and help me to be happy on the ordinary days!

I felt like you have been saying hey to me for the past 2 days!  Yesterday on 2/22 (your favorite #), our bank account balance was all 2's!  Right down to the $.22!  It was wild.  Then this morning when your dad & I went to Waffle House for breakfast, a truck went by in front of us pulling a new white utility trailer.  On the side it said Home Improvements by EDDIE painted in bright yellow paint.  then afterwards we went to Lowes and got soem stuff for the house and coming home at the light we were behind a mustang with 3 girls in it, on the back windshield it said 'Lips of an Angel' with hearts (not sure what that was supposed to mean?) and the license plate was from MD and there was an OBX sticker on the back!  Then we were watching a show and the main character was a young man named Brian, who was on the basketball team, #2 (close) and was on a scholarship at Duke!  Huh, wouldn't you have loved that!  Just fun little reminders that say hi from you to me!  Hey, like they say, 'Whatever gets you through the day'!

I love you Brian.  I hope everyday is like a Happy Birthday in heaven!  Shine on my sweet baby boy!  Always and forever a mama's boy!

Love, Mom

   
to me! 
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Asking for forgiveness  / Lynda (Brian Colletti's mom )
Please Forgive Me

Dear Father God,
I know that I've done wrong through my thoughts, my actions, and the things that I've said, sometimes by mistake and sometimes on purpose. I have gone my own way and not put you at the center of my life. I am very sorry and ask that you please forgive me. I thank you that I can ask you this because I truly believe that your Son, Jesus, died in my place and, through Him, I have access to you. Please help me to follow you more closely every day and live a life which gives glory back to you. I pray this in Jesus' name.
Amen.

---

I found this to be such a simple prayer, as far as the words go, but to pray this from the heart, that's the true challenge!  We all want forgiveness, even those who think they don't.  

I started to wonder, if we are praying for God to forgive us of our sins and usually we expect him to or we have been taught that He forgives us of all sins if we repent and ask His forgiveness, then I wonder- Do we practice this in our own lives?  Do we live our own lives with a forgiving heart?  Or do we pick and choose those whom we will forgive based on the 'sin' committed?  

I asked myself this question.  I can honestly answer that I consciously do my best to live each day with a forgiving heart.  That doesn't mean that I do not get angry at the actions of others.  Of course I do!  Do you really think I have never gotten angry at the young man who killed my son?  If you thought for one second that just because I forgive him in my heart that means I am not angry with him, you are mistaken!  I don't feel rage (anymore), I am not comsumed with anger and constantly dwelling on what he did to Brian, to me, to my family but the action itself makes me mad!  The unfairness of it sometimes hits me and I feel anger!  The frustration from the fact that there is nothing I can do to change what has happened and the anguish over the pain and sorrow that's embedded in my soul forever often provokes angry feelings!  I'm human, anger is a natural emotion and it can be a very healthy and helpful emotion.  What I do with my anger is up to me.  That's the key.

Holding grudges, wanting to hurt someone because they have hurt us, wishing harm to another because their actions somehow caused us or someone we love harm, that's anger without forgiveness.  An unforgiving heart is an angry heart!  And an angry heart doesn't do anyone any good, especially the one who carries that heart.  It steals your joy.  It ruins love.  It haults happiness and it kills.  I do not believe that it is possible to harbor unforgiveness in our soul and expect it not to hurt anyone else.  Eventually it will consume you and it will hurt anyone and everyone you come in contact with.  It will destroy anything good in your life.  No matter how small the 'grudge' seems, it has more power than you give it credit for!  It will and does grow.  Sometimes slowly, quietly and when you least expect it, bam!  Something triggers that little grudge and you are blown away by the strength it has the power it holds!  Your grudge turned into resentment and that resentment grew until it finally exploded!  You had no idea that you were a ticking timebomb...although I bet there were a few around that saw it coming.  

We cannot afford to pick and choose who we forgive or what we will forgive.  I want the Lord to forgive me for my mistakes, for my wrong doings, for those things I knew were wrong but did it anyway and for the things I didn't even realize I had done.  I want him to forgive me so I can be set free, so I can live with him one day and rejoice in all of the rewards he has for me!  I need to guard my soul against the toxic forces out there, I need to do what I know is right for me.  I have forgiven others who never even asked for my forgiveness.  I didn't do it for them, I did it for God and for me.  They are on their own when it comes to asking for God's forgiveness, and hopefully by my own willingness to live with a forgiving heart, it will encourage another soul to seek the Lord's forgiveness and claim their spot in heaven!

Peace, Love & Forgiveness,
Lynda

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You came to me for all three REASON'S! LOve you, and will alway's miss ya!  / Laura Ketrow (sister-in-love)
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a
lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that
person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a
need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a
difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically,
emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any
wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say
or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die.
Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a
stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire
fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered
and now it is time to move on.
>
> Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your
turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of
peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy Believe it, it is
real. But only for a season.
>
> LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you
must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job
is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned
to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said
that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant
>
>
>
> Thank you for being a part of my life,
> whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.
>
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Happy Valentine's Day sweet Angel Brian & to your precious Family  / Ruth Twin/Jose Figueira (connected by Angels )

ALL MY LOVE TO YOU!
GOD BLESS!

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Happy Valentine's Day Brian...  / Mom

I love you so much Brian and I wish you were here with us!  Life without you here is so much less than what it was when you were with us...  Even though I know you are always with us in our hearts and I believe that you are watching over us and that your spirit is always around, it still hurts not to be able to see you, talk to you, hear your voice, your laugh, watch you dance or just hang out.  On Valentine's Day we think about all of those that we love and hold dear...  I have so many people that I love and I know love me, I am truly blessed.  Yet all of the love in the world can never replace my love for you or yours for me.  That is ours alone and I will always miss being able to share that with you.  I know that love never dies and my love for you still grows every day.  I hold on for the day when I will get to see you again and hug your neck!  God I miss your hug!  I love you Brian.  Happy Valentine's Day!  Be sweet.
Love, Mom

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